Since going to see a life coach in 2013, the years that followed have been ones of intense self-learning, discovery, and recovery. Essentially, I started applying the problem-solving skills I had developed as a student of the design industry to myself, which was… extremely difficult. But being on this road made a video I found in 2018—and what I eventually pieced together from it—all the more earth-shattering.

I have aphantasia.
As I watched this video, my processes, my mannerisms, the way I’d handle myself in disagreements—the why of all of it suddenly started to make sense. I always thought the whole “picture yourself on a desert island” was a metaphor, not something somebody could actually do.

The “Re-Designer”

“My name is Bryan Veloso, and I am a re-designer. I do not create, I improve. I do not envision what is new, I envision how something that already exists can be better.”

This was the opening to a post I wrote in 2010.
Being a re-designer was a strong part of my personal brand and what people came to know me for.

I thought back to my 12 years working professionally in the industry: every position I’ve held, every website I’ve made, and every statement I’ve made about myself as a web designer. I had a career that I was proud of, but I changed the question from “how was I able to do all this?” to “how did my aphantasia direct the way I chose to design?”

A much better question.

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My specialization in design came from a library of techniques and inspirational imagery. Techniques were about knowing how to ask the right question or approach the right resource, while inspirational imagery depended on the project. Early in my career, sites like the CSS Zen Garden gave me insight into design possibilities, shaping my ability to improve existing concepts rather than create from scratch.

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If you’re a designer—or in any creative field—dealing with similar challenges, my journey with aphantasia has shown me that embracing what makes you different can lead to valuable insights and innovation.